英语作文笔记

写作的宏观总结

一、考研大纲的四个巨变：

1、增加了考研听力

2、去掉了词汇和语法部分，加大了完型填空的难度

3、把阅读和翻译合二为一

4、加大了写作的难度

二、四次课的重点

1、考研写作的十大困境

2、考研写作出现的各类题型（四大类主力题型，十一种功能段落）

3、范文分析

4、语言分析

第一部分考研写作中的各类问题

一、写作中的十大困境

1、滔滔不绝意识流

意识流创作有两种表现：(1) 自由分段

(2) 语言杂乱

注意：要控制语言；语句控制(第一段写三到四句；第二段写七到八句；第三段写五到六句)

原则：紧扣提纲、紧扣要求

2、无话可说真难受

值得考虑的话题：(1) 大型宏观话题如：城乡差异、代沟、友谊、爱心、健康、实干精神、

生态平衡、文化等

(2) 小型微观话题如：WTO、中国足球、克隆现象、安乐死、海归派、

考研热等

训练方法：(1) 例证法如：沉溺于上网(web addiction)、青少年犯罪、TV ads (win-win deal

双赢)、It pays to be honest等

(2) 平时的思维拓展练习

长文章的五要素：利与弊、不同的观点、寻找原因及后果、解决措施、未来趋势

3、真情流露没必要

写作的三个角度：语言第一位；结构第二位；内容第三位

要求：结构简单，而语言卓越，但在内容上只要相关即可

4、思维跳跃断层多

英语中启、承、转、合的设置

启：启动观点，开篇点题Nowadays, there is growing concern over …;

When it comes to …,people hold different opinions.

It is generally believed that …

承：涉及文章第二段（拓展段），原因一、二、三，方面一、二、三要有层次感

In the first place…; above all; To begin with ;For one thing; On the one hand;

In the second place…; In addition; Further more; More over; What’s more;

For another ; On the other hand;

Last but not least; More importantly; Even worse;

转：表示转折的方法如下：

However; On the contrary; Conversely; Whereas; Instead; Nevertheless;

合：表示合并总结：

As a result; As a consequence; consequently; Accordingly; Therefore; Thus;

Hence; In conclusion; To sum up; In brief; In sort; On the whole; By and large;

Generally speaking; As somebody put(puts) it; As the saying goes;

句与句之间要衔接，段与段之间要过渡

5、英语表达憋得慌

解决的方法：要靠日常的积累，大量的积累。积累优秀的写作语言，积累各类主题相关词。

Non-government-run school 民办私立学校；entry 加入（中国加入世贸）；

protect intellectual property rights 保护知识产权；pirated software 盗版软件；

pirated video products/materials 盗版音像制品；advance with times与时俱进；

sustainable developments 可持续发展；to get online 上网；forward an email 发邮件；

to get offline 下网；mobile phone 手机；bring sth. into full play 充分发挥；

6、盲目动笔凑字数

考研写作要求字数大约200字左右，评分有五个档次：

1、17~20分：思维丰富，语言非常漂亮，运用了相当多得好词语等；

2、13~16分：语言比较通畅，有些闪光点，但也有一些小错误等；

3、9~12分：没什么闪光点，语言简单乏味，数字够了；

4、5~8分：语言错误太明显，且比较多；

5、0~4分：跑题，不符合题目的要求，语言太差；

在考试中不要盲目动笔凑字数，而是要集中火力写好前三句，写好第一段和第二段。

7、低级错误常出现

要去检查自己的作文，语言方面可以从以下七个角度去检查：

1、主谓一致

2、检查时态（议论文的事态尽量统一成现在时。包括一般现在时、现在进行时、

现在完成时、一般将来时、现在完成进行时等等。）3、检查冠词的用法（原则是：特指的名词

加the，泛指的单词不加the）4、名词的单复数5、检查介词搭配6、检查拼写错误

7、检查中文思维

a. 用词不当acquire /gain knowledge; eliminate illiteracy 扫除文盲;

be entitled to/have access to free medical care享受公费医疗;

b. 句法差异according to sb. It is impossible..

c. 冗赘现象

d. 逻辑错误

e. 常见的语法错误

8、处于被动危害大

9、语言单调没变化

写作要求40分钟写200字的文章

一、表明indicate; reveal; reflect; demonstrate; convey; suggest; illustrate;

二、认为believe; suppose; argue; convince; reckon; assume; insist; maintain; in my

opinion; I am of the opinion that …; I hold the view that …; as far as I am

concerned …; as far as I can see; in my eyes; increasely;

10、 龙飞凤舞笔迹乱

第二部分：图画作文

写作的训练：

1、寻找参照物

2、两种训练方法：(1) 英汉互译

(2) 模仿法-imitation

2002年写作真题

study the following picture carefully and write an essay entitled "Cultures--National and International".

In the essay you should

1) describe the picture and interpret its meaning, and

2) give your comment on the phenomenon.

You should write about 200 words neatly on ANSWER

SHEET 2.(20 points)

关于comment 的三个写作角度：

1、提建议 your suggestions, your solutions;

2、考虑背景及原因 background and reasons;

3、描述未来、预测未来;

三个经典跑题现象

(审题构思时应注意：以小见大、把握象征寓意)

描述图画的单词：

发带 ribbon;耳环 earrings;项链 necklace;

少数民族 minority group;妇女服饰 accessories

范文再现： This picture vividly depicts a lovely American girl in traditional Chinese costume with a sweet smile on her face. She wears ribbons, earrings, necklaces and other accessories, that are characteristic of the clothes of a certain Chinese minority group. Undoubtedly, this costume has added oriental charm to her beautiful look.

What the picture conveys goes far beyond only a fashion trend. Instead it carries cultural meanings. The fact that people from different countries are attracted to the mysterious Chinese culture, indicates that to some extent a culture can be accepted, respected, appreciated, and shared internationally. In other words, a nation's unique culture can become international （走向世界） through worldwide economic and cultural exchanges. Since the trend of globalization seems increasingly irresistible （不可抵挡）, cultural communications will effectively improve mutual understanding and friendship.

In my opinion, national culture as a priceless spiritual treasure should be preserved and

cherished. Yet there are good reasons to advocate international culture. For those ideas from the

an American girl in traditional Chinese costume

other cultures, controversial（有争议的、格格不入的）or even absurd at first sight, can provide a different perspective for us to observe the world. However, when we are confronted with a different culture, we should be sensible enough to absorb its essence and to resist its dark side （取其精华、去其糟粕）. Only in this way can we promote cultural development positively, and make our world dimensional, colorful and vigorous.

写作题型总结：

1、提纲式作文（91年--96年）

2、图表作文（97年、99年）

3、图画作文（98年、00年、01年、02年、03年）

4、情景式作文（新增加，尚未考过）

5、简单应用文（新增加，尚未考过）

着重研究事务信函（分为建议信、求职信、申请信、表扬信、投诉信等）

四大类主题题型总结：

1、观点对比选择题

eg.(91年) Where to live, in the city or the country?

提纲：1、城市的利与弊

2、乡村的利与弊

3、我的看法，我的选择

（四六级99年）Reading selectively or extensively?

（四六级97年）My view on job-hopping

（四六级00年）大学英语口语考试是否必要？

推荐题目：(1) Which to celebrate, western festivals or the Chinese?

(2) Cyber-bars' advantages and disadvantages（网吧的利与弊）

(3) My view on private cars

2、现象阐释题

eg.(93年) TV advertisements

提纲：(1) present states

(2) reasons

(3) my comments

(94年) On making friends

阐释：(1) the need for friend

(2) true friendship

(3) my principle

(96年) good health

阐释：(1) importance of good health

(2) ways to keep fit

(3) my own practice

新概念：亚健康状态、全民补钙、关爱老年人健康、绿色食品、全民健身、爱滋病的蔓延、精神抑

郁症、保龄秋热、瑜珈功热、健身操热、疯牛病的威胁...

第二段：对keep fit 的错误理解；

三种可行的观点：（1）锻炼身体及方式；

（2）保证饮食健康；

have regular meals;

go on a diet;

（3）同样要保证精神健康；

optimistic mentality 开朗乐观的心态

第三段：自己保持身体健康的各种方法。

(02年) Cultures-- National and International

阐释略（看前面的范文）

3、问题解决题

关键：文章的第三段，如何解决问题

代表作：(98年) Such promises

考题描述：图片插入语：（1）本母鸡下蛋不见棱见角；

（2）保证有蛋皮、蛋清、蛋黄；

蛋清egg white; 蛋皮egg shell; 蛋黄yolk; 都不必写。

打油诗：各行各业兴承诺，欢迎监督不委托；

原本皆为份内事，何须高唱文明歌。

图画作文做题原则：构思时，需要以小见大，把握象征寓意。

分析主题：抨击各行各业中对于完成自己职责的浮夸风；

提倡少说空话、多干实事的精神。

提建议的思路：先说国家、政府该怎么办，问题主要是由于国家的法律制度不健全，所以国家政

府应当制定法律法规；第二条思路，自己应提高个人觉悟；或者再加上具体做法。

建议：平时多注意这类事物，有意识的自我练习。

举例：(1) 讽刺中小学、大学的乱收费问题overcharging；

(2) 讽刺电视节目对儿童的不利影响；

(3) 讽刺大城市的空气污染现象。

尤为重要：以小见大，把一个现象看作一个普遍现象。

(98年) Such promises

(03年) 温室中的花朵经不起风雨

题目分析：温室green house;

要锻炼自己的独立生活能力，在艰苦环境下磨练自己的毅力才有前途，才能发展。4、观点论证题（01年出现）

（文章第二段中）命题角度：1、举例论证段

2、原因论证段

3、数据论证段

代表作：(01年) 爱心是一盏灯，在越黑暗的地方越明亮。（助人为乐的主题）

2000年考题

Study the following two pictures carefully and write and essay to

1) describe the pictures,

2) deduce （推理）the purpose of the drawer of the pictures, and

3) suggest counter-measures （对策）.

You should write about 200 words neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. As is shown in the pictures, we can see clearly that with the rampancy of commercial fishing, the number of fishes considerably decreased. In one picture, there were various kinds of fish and only one fishing-boat in 1900. On the contrary, in 1995 there was only one fish, but many

fishing-boats. The purpose of this picture （修正为the two pictures 或

the pictures 与第一段一致）is to show us that due attention

has to be paid to the decrease （可换为decline 、reduction 、shrinkage 、shrinking ）of ocean

resources. Owing to

over-fishing the number of fishes has obviously decreased

（可换为declined 、reduced 、shrunk ）. If we let this situation

go as it is, we won't know where fish is in the future. （一

般说我不知道，你不知道，他不知道用一般现在时就够了：I don't

know 不管过去，现在，未来都用这个形式，于是改为：will be in the future 。）By that time, our environment will suffer a great destruction.（提示：By +未来时间：将来完成时对应结构是：will have done 即我们将已经……）

Therefore, it is imperative for us to take drastic （firm ） measures. For one thing, we should appeal to our authorities to make strict laws to control commercial fishing. For another, we should enhance （cultivate ） the awareness of people that the ocean resources are very vital （重要的）to us. Only in this way can we protect our ocean resources. Also I believe that we humans can overcome this difficulty, and we will have a brilliant future.

模仿法举例：

1、describe the picture

2、deduce the purpose of the drawer of the picture

3、Suggest your countermeasures

owing to 由于…原因

clear-cutting 砍伐森林

rampant 过度的

wildlife 野生动植物

If we let this situation go as it is, our environment will suffer a great destruction.

It is imperative for us to take drastic measures.

…we should appeal to our authorities to make strict laws to control clear-cutting.

On the other hand/For another, we should also enhance our awareness that forest resources

A brief History of World Commercial Fishing

are vital to us.

Only in this way can we …

Also I believe that we humans can overcome this problem/difficulty, and we will have a bright future.

范文八

Directions:

A. Study the following cartoon carefully and write

and essay in about 200 words.

B. Your essay must be written clearly on ANSWER

SHEET II.

C. Your essay should meet the requirements

below:

1.Describe the cartoon and the message conveyed

2. Draw a conclusion and give your comment on

the cartoon

Pollution is becoming more and more serious all over the world. As is shown in the cartoon, two cars are giving off waste gas and three people trying to avoid breathing in the poisonous gas by masking their face with their hands. The poisonous gas sent off by factories, domestic appliances and automobiles has made the air unhealthy for people to breathe.

There is no denying that automobiles are indications of civilization, progress and development; nevertheless, automobiles cause the serious problem of air pollution. Scientists have warned that unless effective measures are taken, the problem of pollution will eventually get out of hand （除非采取有效的措施，否则问题将会失控）. Actually, people are showing a real （可替换为growing ）concern over （固定搭配） the problem. For example, there is an increasingly loud voice from the public for firm action against pollution from automobiles.

Indeed, the earth is our home and we have the duty to take care of it for ourselves and for our descendants. In my opinion, we should work out concrete solutions to the problem of pollution from poisonous gas given off by automobiles. For example, the automobiles should be equipped with a device which can dispose of waste gas.

I concrete solutions to the problem of pollution from poisonous gas given off by automobiles. For example, the automobiles should be equipped with a device which can dispose of waste gas so as to prevent it from polluting air . Only in this way can we really solve the problem of air pollution caused by automobiles.（优点：在文末用倒装句展现句型的丰富多变）

Cartoon ：漫画，卡通画 picture ，photo ：照片

give off ： 排放 send off ：排放

waste gas ：废气 poisonous gas ：有毒气体

家用电器：domestic appliances household appliances

不可否认的是：there is no denying that

……是……的标志：are indications of或者用is an indication of 又或者是are indicative of ……是……的象征：is a symbol of同样有：be symbolic of

标志着：indicate 或者是：symbolize

尽管如此：nevertheless

导致严重问题cause the serious problem

同义词：严重的severe; severe problem严重的问题;severe consequence严重的结果; grave

严厉果断的措施：firm action 坚决果断的：drastic 所以也可替换为：drastic measures

在我看来：in my opinion 制定出：work out 制定法律：make laws

取的作文高分的必要前提是句型要丰富多变，要有倒装句。

图画作文范文之三

范文十

Directions:

A. Study the following cartoon

carefully and write an essay in

about 200 words.

B. Your essay must be written

clearly on ANSWER SHEET II.

C. Your essay should meet the

requirements below:

1. Describe the cartoon and the message conveyed

2. Draw a conclusion and give your comment on the cartoon.

Today, the earth's deserts are spreading and getting larger and desertification is a serious problem

facing the world. The major reason for this is irresponsible cutting down of trees. As is shown in the first cartoon, when people cut down trees desert forces on（沙漠以巨大的动力向前推进，势不可挡）and becomes irrepressible.

People cut down trees for various reasons （重复）but they may forget that trees play a vital part in water and soil conservation（水土保持）. Trees can preserve moisture（储存湿度，水分）and fertility（养分，土壤的肥沃度，来源于fertile）in the soil, protect soil against erosion and prevent fertile land from becoming desert. Therefore when people cut down all of the trees, the earth lies bare and dry in the hot sun, and desert is inevitable.

Desertification can lead to many other serious problems which may threaten the existence of human beings, such as a reduction of arable land, terrible droughts （旱灾）and famine（饥荒）. In order to prevent desertification, people have to plant trees, as the second cartoon shows. The time when people plant trees is the time when desert retreats. People should not cut down trees any more, as is done in the first cartoon, but rather, they should plant more

（

丰富多彩）

沙漠化：desertification

压制，克制：repress; 可以压制的：repressible; 失控的：irrepressible 同义：get out of hand fertile land,fertile soil 肥沃的土地; nutrition 食物的营养; soil erosion 土壤侵蚀;

可耕作的：arable ; 可耕地的减少：reduction of arable land

第三部分考研写作的训练方法

复习：

学习写作的训练方法：

1.会意法

找一篇250~300字的范文，反复的英汉互译，通过此过程中的检查和比较来发现自己的语法和拼写错误，逐渐使范文作者的语言中的优秀的闪光点为我所用，从而达到提高自己水平的目的。

2.模仿法

在每联一篇范文的时候都把它的好的句型和闪光点抄在卡片上，不断的accumulation并汇集成册，然后在以后每次的训练中刻意的用3~5个，这样循序渐进，作文便有把握突破10分，12分。

学习方法方面的建议：

一. 强化词汇

词汇量少会导致语言贫乏,没有办法做到丰富多变，所以需要大幅度扩展词汇，譬如接近考研大纲要求的5300个词汇，如果在词汇量没有大幅度扩展的时候，期望以题海战术来提高的话，效果是不会太明显的。

建议在7月份之前至少把去年的大纲词汇过一遍，在新大纲出台后再结合新大纲，查漏补缺。这样通过词汇量的大幅扩展就可以使听力，阅读，写作的水平都有很大的提高。

单词记忆的几点建议：

1. 卡片记忆：把难记的单词，长单词，偏词，怪词记在卡片上，在平时多看几遍，从而轻松的就记住了。

2. 通过阅读记忆：在上面记住的基础上，通过大量阅读，不断应用,不断重复，不断检验，便可以牢牢的记

住了。

3. 经常自测：譬如利用单词表，先看英语说汉语意思，其中不熟的，没记住的，单独摘出来或标记出来；再

反过来，看英语说汉语，也把不熟的和没记住的标出来，对这些反复的记忆。

4. 寻找考研伙伴，互相测试: 每天互相考一下，把难记的，长的，偏的，怪的多考一考，利用互相的竞

争意识，来激发学习的欲望，从而但到记忆的目的。

二. 学以致用：在记住的基础上不断练习，达到熟能生巧的效果。

例句: 大家普遍认为

译文一: People usually think

译文二: It is universally acknowledged that

译文三: It is generally accepted that

译文四: It is widely believed that

例句: 不言而喻

译文一: It goes without saying that

译文二: There is no denying that

例句: 大家普遍认为互联网在现代社会中发挥着越来越重要的作用。

译文：It is universally acknowledged that internet is playing an increasingly important role in our information society.

译文：It goes without saying that internet is playing an increasingly important role in our information society.

例句: 大家普遍公认Beatles是英国历史上最伟大的摇滚乐队。

译文：It is universally acknowledged that Beatles is the greatest rock-band in the British history.

译文：There is a common belief that Beatles is the greatest rock-band in the British history.

三. 把书读透：面对大量的优秀的权威的资料，书籍，买了好多，但是每本都浅尝辄止，这样做是根本没

有效果的。我们从多个英语学习成功人士的事例中总结出来的方法是，选定一本喜欢的书，认真地把它读透，把里面的每个单词，每个优秀的句子，包括磁带都钻研透，这样的话应该会有巨大的飞跃。四：在写作中培养一丝不苟的学习态度：

良好的写作习惯不仅在考试中会拥有优势；而且对于形成良好的工作习惯，以及作为众多的英语学习者中的佼佼者而脱颖而出都是大有裨益的。我从我的学习经历中总结出来，只有始终抱着一丝不苟的态度，对所作的工作，认真的反复的检查，才能保证精品的诞生。积少成多，聚沙成塔，一两个小错误不在乎的话，错误多了，就有可能掩盖你工作真正的闪光点。所以说真正优秀的英语要一滴滴积累，一点点磨练才能换来的。

第四部分考研作文范文分析

主旨：以一丝不苟的态度对范文认真地分析，从而提高对语言的敏感性。

好的作文需要语言丰富多变：重要的单词尽量不重复有些主题词难免重复：譬如computer，PC 对于非主题词，如形容词，副词，动词则能改造就改造，用同义词，近义词来表达。

减少，缩减；decrease

减少，衰退，范围减少；decline；decline；declined

减少reduce；reduction；reduced

范围减小，范围减缩；shrink；shrinkage; shrinking; shrunk

改造动词时要具体情况具体分析，对特殊动词要注意它的特殊的过去式形式

（具体修改在2000年真题，第6页上的范文）

图画作文范文二--范文八

（见第7页上的范文）

图画作文范文之三--范文十

（见第8页上的范文）

推荐的文章结尾采用的高难度句型：

一. 倒装句型：

Only……或者Only in this way……

或者是Only b y doing so……

即：倒装句Only+介词短语

二. 强调句

It is ……that……结构

例如：It is in this way/It is by doing so that we can solve the problem.

三. 虚拟句型

It is high time

例如：It is high time that we changed present situation.

It is high time that we solved the problem.

注意：虚拟语气必须在从句中采用动词过去时

重写范文十：

缺点：一般的图画作文第一段应该先描述图画，不应该急于分析原因，一般的原因分析在第二段，提出建议在第三段。（结构散乱）

建议：写作文如果要分段的话，每一段应该是一个大的内容，第二段只讲原因，第三段提出建议，展望未来。切不可把内容拆散到各段去。

步骤：第一段详细描述图画信息，As is shown in the pictures, we can see clearly the struggle (fight或battle)between people and desert.In one picture, people are fleeing the greedy(hungry、overwhelming)desert.(说明：图画和图表的所配文字可以用caption)The caption indicates that as the sand advances ,we retreat.On the contrary, the second picture depicts people carrying tools, young trees and water(说明：spade铁锹；黑桃tool工具sapling 树苗；young trees树苗) to plant the earth again.The words demonstrate that as we force on the sandhills withdraw(recede).

第二段：The purpose of the two pictures as to show as that due attention has to be paid to the harms of desertification(desert expansion).Owing to people's rampant clear cutting, desert is rapidly occupying our living space.In particular,the sharp increase of sand storms is sounding an alarm to us human beings.If we let this situation go as it is,our environment will suffer a great destruction.

Therefore(as the result, thus, hence, accordingly, in my opinion, in conclusion), it is imperative for us to take drastic measures(要迫切采取严厉的措施). For one thing(on the one hand, above all), we should appeal to our authorities(governments)to make strict laws(make laws 制定法律，可替换为work out laws) to control deforestation(森林砍伐：clear cutting, deforestation，the cutting of forests植树造林：forestation). For another(on the other hand, in addition, what's more, further more), we should also enhance the awareness of people that the natural resources are very vital to us. Only in this way can we protect our natural resources. Also I believe that we humans can overcome this difficulty, and we will have a brilliant future.

水土保持：water and soil conservation

可以使用从句形式：forest resources are very vital to us

利用倒装句：Only in this way can we protect our natural resources.

利用强调句：It is in this way……，By doing so can we……

2001年作文：

Among all the worthy feelings of mankind, love is probably the

noblest, but everyone has his/her own understanding of it. (在

人类的所有价值感情里面，爱心可能是最崇高的，但是每个人理解不同)

There has been a discussion recently on the issue in a

newspaper. Write an essay to the newspaper to

1) show your understanding of the symbolic meaning of the

picture below, (即在第一段里面要把图画的象征寓意点出来)

2) give a specific example, (要给出一个具体的例子)and

3) give your suggestion as to the best way to show love.

You should write about 200 words on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20

points)

作文要求的改动：字数增多，由150增到200个；分值加大，评分标准

放宽。增加情景语言，即：情景说明，提纲说明，以及图画。

重要原则：英语情景说明语句，不可直接照搬，需要进行改动。尽量应用同义，近义词，相关表达，不同句式改造。例如worthy 可以替换为valuable，feelings 可以替换为emotions，mankind 可以替换为human being，可以改为be regarded as/be considered as /be taken as/be viewed as/be thought of as the noblest，noblest可以替换为greatest，

范文一（20）

Among all the worthy feelings of mankind, love is probably the noblest.（照搬情景句很危险）It is of the utmost importance to the human beings（爱心对人类有至关重要的意义）, Everybody not only needs love, but also should give love.

As is described in the picture, "love is a lamp which is brighter in darker places. " This is indeed true. People in darker places need more light than ordinary people.（逻辑错误）Maye even a dim light（微弱的光）can give them much hope for a better life and progress. Maybe just a thread of light（一线的光芒）will call forth their strength and courage to step out of（走出困境）their difficulties.

For instance when someone is starving to death, just a little food and water from you may save his life.（我们只是给出一些食物和水就可以帮助他拯救生命）Or when a little girl in a poor rural area drops out of school because of poverty, just a small sum of money from you may support her to finish her schooling and change her life（改变了女孩的人生）.In this cases, you have given love which is like a lamp in a dark place where light is most needed.（在这些例子里面，你已经表现了爱心，向黑暗中的一盏灯一样。）

So to sum up [So to sum up 因此，概括一下应该么改为as a result/therefore（因此）要么就改为in conclusion/to sum up （概括总结）], we should offer our help to all who are in need. We expect to get love from others and we also give love to others so when you see someone in difficulty or in distress and in need of help, don't hesitate to give your love to him. I believe then the ralationship between people will be harmonious and our society will be a better place for us to live in.

When……just……结构：当某人遇到……的困境的时候，我们只是这样……就解决了问题。

suppose sb. doing sth.结构：假设某人正遇到……的困境的时候，我们将……

imagine sb. doing sth.,we should……结构：假设某人正遇到……的困境的时候，我们将……

联想：A friend in need is a friend indeed.患难之交才是真正的朋友

范文二：（16）

It is generally believed that love is a hot topic which is most talked about.（句子内容重复，没有真实内容）This is true not only in China but also in other countries. We live in different countries, speak different languages, but love is something common to us all. But how to show love（结构混乱）may be different with different people in different countries. This is something we should give more thought to.

As shown in the picture, love is like a lamp which shines brightest in dark places. This tells us a simple truth: Love is like a lamp. It is most valuable when it is most needed. For example, once I saw a foreign lady get lost in the street. She could not speak Chinese and nobody seemed to be able to help her. Though my English is not very good and I was a shy person(I was shy/I was very shy 就够了), I thought she needed help very much.（desperately绝望地；极度地）I asked her what she wanted. She told me she lost her way, so I showed her the way to her hotel. It was a small thing but she thanked me very much（sincerely真诚的）because my help was needed very much.（my help was most needed）My help was like a lamp in a dark place.

I think（太口语，最好使用：in my opinion/as far as I am concerned/to sum up/in conclusion/on the whole）we all should be like a lamp in a dark place, showing our love, giving our help to others, even to strangers. In this way we can（一般用：Only in this way can we）make this world a harmonious and peaceful world.

“不同”还可以用：differ from，vary from ，distinct from

范文三：（10）

In the picture below, in the full dark situation（语句搭配不当，应该说：画面，背景，角落等等）, a little of spark enlightens（enlighten启发，启发某人做……事用词不当；应该用brighten）the dark. The naive（naive 幼稚，无知，傻乎乎的（贬义词），innocent天真的（褒义词））spark smiles so sweet. It seems to be saying, as the caption in the picture reads, I am a light of love, the more dark where I am, the more enlighten.（错误1：dark 的比较级应该是darker错误2：dark 这样的短词是没必要加more的）

Among all the worthy feelings of mankind, love is probably the noblest. As a matter of fact, all of us survive in a love world. （切勿直接照搬情景句）We offer love, more important, we need love. I am a hardworking student that（对人不应该用that 引导从句，应该用who）is specialized in Computer Science and Application. Once a time（英语中的有一次只可以说：Once 或者at one time）, I lost my mind（我发疯了：I lost my mind心不在焉：I was absence of mind）accidentally as a result I dropped down from the downstairs（downstairs 不合逻辑应该改为upstairs）, badly injured. but for 结构：要不是因为……主句里面应该用情态动词+完成式(would/could have

done)）my roommates' help I couldn't live up not only in physics（在物理方面：in physics 在酒精方面：in spirits 在肉体方面：in physical 在精神方面：in mental/mentally）but also in spirits.

I thank them（时态错误，应该用I thanked）genuinly（genuinely: 真诚地）. What I accomplished today（应该用现在时态: I have accomplished）party（party 聚会，partially 部分地）attribute to （attribute sth. to sth. ：……要被归功于……attribute 的宾语提前的话，应该使用被动语态应该是：sth. should be attributed to）all of them giving me a hand to my school work. I hope（习惯用法：一旦用hope, 从句中应该用will 即如: I hope she will）I can live up to myself as well as my roommates.

As far as I am concerned（在我看来）, love should be showed by two means（通过两种方式表达爱心）as follows. At the first place（应该改为in the first place 首先,第一）, we should keep a critical eye（keep an eye on sth. 词组: 密切关注，照料，照顾）on others' love showed to us. Of course, most of the love is good for us, nevertheless, some does harm to us, such as helping to cheating in exams. The last but no the least（第二点应该用：in the second place/in addition what's morethe last but not the least 一般用于三个方面的最后一个，只有两点是不用该词组的）, we should show love hearts（表达爱心应该用show love 而不是show love heart）to those needing them. As we know, Hope Project（希望工程在英语中应该说：project hope）is the largest love project in our country, you should pay highly attention on it rather than neglect. In addition, we should cultivate the awareness（要培养我们的意识）to help others in our daily life. Let's hold our hands（hold our hands：握手join our hands：团结一心）to build our country filled in love hearts.（filled in：填表，filled with：充满；爱心应该用love 就可以了）

写出好的作文应做的准备：

一. 大规模的积累主题相关词，优秀的句型词组。

二. 需要大规模的减少语法错误和拼写错误。

图表作文介绍：

一般有四种考试形式。

第一种叫: table，即表格题。最大的难度是如何挑选最典型的数据来描述，不能面面俱到，要找有说服型的。

应该采取的原则：首尾呼应原则。只看开始和结尾，中间的忽略不计。即起点是多少，终点是多少，增加了多少。

可采取的动词：增加：increase from to 减少：decrease from to

第二种叫：pie chart, 饼状图或圆形图。

必不可少的词组：由……部分组成: consist of ，be made up of ，be composed of，

占多大比例：account for，take up

第三种叫：bar chart，柱状图。要把柱状物的顶端纵横对位，找到精确的数据。

第四种叫：graph，曲线图。

基本术语：增加，上升：increase; grow; rise; climb; go up.

减少：decrease; reduce; decline; fall; go down; shrink.

保持不变: remain stable/steady/unchanged;

相关副词：sharply; dramatically; considerably; rapidly.(表示大幅度的4个副词)

gradually（逐渐地); steadily(稳步地); slightly(微弱地);

基本术语: 波动：fluctuate

例如：微弱的波动：fluctuate slightly

有一些小的波动：There are some small/slight fluctuations .

大幅度的波动：fluctuate dramatically/sharply/ considerably

起伏升降：rise and fall

递增：on the rise/on the increase

递减：on the decline

难点：图表作文的难点不在第一段的描述上，关键在于第二段如何透过数据挖掘实质。第三段针对现象提出建议。

Directions:（两表对比题）

A. Study the following graphs carefully and write an essay in at least 150 words.

B. Your essay must be written neatly on ANSWER SHEET II.

C. Your essay should cover these three points:

1. effect of the country's growing human population on its wildlife（这个国家不断增长的人口

对野生动物的影响，如果没有describe，那就点到为止，粗线的描述作文，不用引用数据。如果有describe, 就要找出数据用图表语言详细描述。）

2. possible reason for the effect（写出影响原因。）

3. your suggestion for wildlife protection（针对现状，危机提出建议。）

第一个图：随着时代的变化，美国人口的增长。递增：on the rise; increase steadily;

第二个图：species：物种；extinction：灭绝；美国物种灭绝的数量随着时间的迁移越来越多。

范文：（高分）

From these graphs（术语正确）, we can draw a conclusion that, with the growth of human population, the number of species has decreased rapidly（可以替换为：decline dramatically;或者用: fall/reduce sharply）in America, and some species have even vanished from our planet.

Why does this phenomenon appear? I think（口语，这里的I think 可以去掉不用，直接用there be 结构。）there are several possible reasons for（这里的可以添加accounting，从而改为词组accounting for）this.（自问自答，好）First（above all）, with a rapid growth of population（可以替换为as the human population grows rapidly 或owing to the human population grows rapidly）, more and more people（这里的可以改换为：a growing number of people 越来越多的人）came to live where some wild species have been living. Then these species have to move to other places. Some of them probably can not adapt to the new environment and die. Second（可以替换为in addition /more importantly好的方面）, although many people look on the wildlife as their friends, some people may not think so. They catch a lot of wild animals and sell them in order to get more money. Third（可以替换为：even worse坏的方面）, with the development of the industry（可以替换as the result of 或as the consequence of）, the natural balance and the ecologic environment are destroyed. The deforestation（clear cutting /cutting off forest）has become more and more serious（这里的可以该换为：increasingly越来越）. So some of the wildlife（没有复数）become homeless and extinct.

In order to protect the wildlife, I have some suggestions. First, the governments should make laws to prevent them from being caught and killed. Second, the governments should educate people to love nature and protect it. Third, as for ourselves, we should take practical actions to protect our living environment.

反复使用，失去语言的魅力

范文（0）——背范文的结果

According to the figures given in the bar charts（柱状图）, it took from the beginning of human life to the year 1830 for the population of the earth to reach one billion. That represents a time span of at least two million years. Then the world population increased rapidly（迅速增长）, adding up to（增长达到了多少）two billion in 1930. The next billion was added by 1960, only thirty years. From then on the global population was on the rise（不断地增长）, amounting to （达到了多少）4 billion in 1975, which is another billion people in only 15 years.（数据不典型，而且不对）

There are at least two reasons, I think, for the sharp increase（剧烈地增长）in world population. In the first place, the birth rate is continuously climbing（不断的爬升）in many countries, especially in developing countries. Generally speaking, people there hold the opinion that children don't cost much and when they get old enough to work they will bring in money and that when parents are old, they will take care of them. Secondly, the death rate i most developed countries declines steadily（稳步地下降）because people's standards of living are raised and health care improves.

rates as（与其……不如……）a fall in death rates as result of improvements in medical care.

学习范文不应该只是去把它全部背下来，而是应该取其精华，去其糟粕，应该借用的是好的句型，好的句型，好的词组，闪光的句型结构，好的谚语。采取模仿法，互译法，而对其中的具体内容应能做到随机应变。

复习：

图表作文一般分为两大类型考察。

一种类型叫粗线条表述，一旦没要求describe,就不需要引用数据论证，只要说出图表的变化就可以了。一种叫细线条作文，或详细描述作文。一旦要求describe，或者make full use，就应该把图表的细节一一表述出来。

今天的内容：

一. 把复杂图表作文讲一下。考研中经常是给出多个图表。

二. 介绍情景作文的创作策略。

三. 事务信函创作的五大要素。

四. 写作中的精彩语言。高分作文的语言特征。

范文（专家版）：在欣赏的时候要注意语言是如何丰富多变的

The two charts show that the increase in the U.S. population has been accompanied by a corresponding（相对应的，相应的；在两表作对比时可以使用）decline in the number of wildlife species （特点：把with句型改成accompanied）. Far too many（同a lot of many）species have been lost already. This poses a danger（构成危险）to ecological balance（生态的：ecological生态的平衡：ecological balance）.

As the human population expands（范围，规模的扩大：expands;在这里可以替换increase，grows）. more and more wild animals are hunted for food, or because they are thought to present a threat（present 当动词使用读[ pri'zent ]也有构成的意思）to man. But studies show that one of the primary causes（一般都用main reasons）of the disappearance（般都用extinct 表示灭绝这里使用disappearance：消失）of wildlife is pollution, which is one of the consequences（后果，贬义词，强调严重的后果；一般用result）of population growth and economic development. This makes us wonder if man is able to share this planet in harmony with（与……和谐共存）other life forms.

In my opinion,（在我看来）it is imperative（迫切的）to take steps（采取措施）to reverse 形容词作动词the disturbing（令人不安的）trend（扭转趋势）illustrated（一般都用show 表示“表现表明”；这里用illustrate“图表中的精彩”用词表现）in the charts. One measure would be to forbid the building of cities in areas where wild life is threatened with extinction. But, more importantly, man must learn to stop polluting the environment, or he himself will become extinct.

多变的词汇

增加：increase; expand; growth

野生动物：wildlife species; species; wild animals; wildlife; other life forms; living creatures

灭绝消亡：have been lost; disappearance; vanish; extinction; become extinct.

构成危险：pose a danger; present a threat; be threatened with;

表明：show; illustrate;

作文时，主题词可以重复，而动词，名词，形容词应该尽量用同义，近义词来替换，即作文的原则：语言丰富多变。

如图表语言中的增加：increase; grow; rise; go up; climb; soar.

减少：decrease; decline; fall; reduce; shrink; go down.

增减幅度很显著：sharply; dramatically; considerably; rapidly;

幅度缓慢；逐渐的：gradually; steadily; slightly.

详细地描述的表达：

增加：increase from…to… 从……增加到了……

减少: decline/decrease from ……to ……

更简洁的表达: 不用from……to……,而是用by；例如: 增长了400：increase by 400

（2001年大纲样题_观点论证题）Directions:

Widespread tobacco consumption has led to grave consequences, yet the tobacco companies still claim that they make a valuable contribution to the world economy.(广泛的烟草销售导致了严重的后果。grave:严重的; still claim that:仍然宣称; 他们为世界经济做出了巨大的贡献) 注意：情景说明是坚决不能直接引用的。情景说明是需要大幅度改造的，哪怕只改一点点也行。

There is a discussion in a newspaper on the above two viewpoints.

Write an essay to the newspaper

1) criticizing their view and (批评他们的观点，但是批评的时候不能够全盘否定，

我们的态度是弊大于利。)

2) justify your stand.（stand=standpoint，要论证我的立场是合理的）

In your essay, make full use of the information provided in the pictures printed below.（make full use，指要充分利用下面的数据，即四个图都应该用到。）

You should write about 200 words on ANSWER SHEET

2001年写作大纲的改革：

1. 单词数目由150增加到200个单词。

2. 分值从15分增加到了20分。

3. 在大纲样题中：增加了情景说明。

这种题目的类型是观点论证题。2001年的考题要举例论证，而这道题要充分利用图表数据去论证。

左上角的是柱状图，bar chart, 可以看出是处于一个减少的趋势。

减少：decrease; decline; reduce;

表达的时候一定要用from to 结构。

英语中没有亿的概念, 只有十亿：billion;所以途中数据应该改为：14.364 billion pounds;14.2 billion pounds

右上角的饼状图：pie chart,

它的特点是可以看出某个部分占多大的比例，应该相应的使用：account for

左下角的图：图上的数字应为200 billion

右下角的图：图上的数字应为 3 million

范文：（高分）

The（vast更有力度）majority of（绝大多数）people would agree that cigarette smoking（吸烟：cigarette smoking 烟草消费：tobacco consumption）has caused（导致：cause; lead to）serious problems.（严重的问题：serious problem; grave consequence;）绝大多数人都同意，吸烟已经导致了严重的问题。But the tobacco companies insist（坚持认为：insist; claim）that they contribute greatly to the world economy（为世界经济做出了巨大的贡献）by paying taxes to the government and employing hundreds of workers.（Widespread tobacco consumption has led to grave consequences, yet the tobacco companies still claim that they make a valuable contribution to the world economy.词性变换）

Personally, I believe that cigarette production and consumption threatens to do more harm than good. Firstly, smoking is responsible for many fatal diseases such as lung cancer, heart diseases and so on. According to the survey, tobacco consumers account for about 20% of the world population, and among them, three million people die from smoking-related diseases every year. The fact that the output of tobacco production is reduced from（或者使用：decrease from……to……）14.364 billion pounds in 1994 to 14.2 billion pounds in 1995 also suggests that people have come to realize the negative effects of smoking. Secondly, tobacco consumption is extremely wasteful of money. As is indicated in the pictures, 200 billion US dollars is lost due to smoking each year. Obviously, the total loss of money around the globe substantially exceeds the gain in the industry.

In conclusion (得出结论) , as the economic development aims at making our life better, we cannot sacrifice our health for short-term financial benefits. If we have to spend more and more money providing medical services for those who suffer from smoking-related illnesses, the notion of promoting economy via（通过）tobacco production is not justifiable（站得住脚的，有道理的）. It is high time that we fought for the total tobacco ban（禁令）.—虚拟语气—

弊大于利：more disadvantages than advantages threatens to do more harm than good 烟草公司之所以还坚持生产烟草，无非认为为政府纳税，并且每年雇用大批劳动力。

常用于图表作文中，意思是根据调查，根据统计。survey 表示调查，相当于investigation 也可以替换为：according to the statistics(根据统计数据)

according to the figures(根据数字，数据) according to the data(根据数字，数据)

句型: the fact that……suggest that……

或者: the fact that……implies that……即透过表面,挖掘实质。

the fact t hat……indicates that……

浪费: waste; is lost;is extremely wasteful of

技巧:动词变成词组例如：very important--be of great importance

emphasize--put emphasis on

观念，观点: notion; 口语中一般用：view; point; opinion;

写到最后一段时，为了丰富句型，我们可以用：

倒装句：Only in this way can we…… Only in this way can we……

强调句：It is ……that…… It is in this way that……

虚拟语气：It is high time that we did sth.

表格题：table

题目是：西安市民的日用花销统计，横向是年份，纵向分别是：食物，衣服，娱乐以及其他和总数。

提纲: 三个方面: 一. 描述变化(describe the changes)。

二. 变化原因(the reasons for the changes)。

三. 预测未来。

难点：因为表格题的数据过多，我们应该有意识的选取典型的数据。

选取的策略：首尾呼应，只找起点和终点的数据，再分析数据的增减变化。在写作中把变化趋势点到为止就可以了。

范文：

What is shown in the table above indicates that dramatic changes have taken place in the people's daily expenses in Xi'an from 1995 to 1999.（点出起点和终点心）The expenses on food have （减少了30%）while those

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